Acknowledge The Corn by D. Agnew Disclaimer: The characters and situations of the television program and movie "The X Files" are the creations and property of Chris Carter, Fox Broadcasting, and Ten-Thirteen Productions, and have been used without permission. No copyright infringement is intended. Spoilers: Never Again, The End and the movie Fight For The Future. Set sometime after the movie. Rating: G Classification: A, UST Summary: After Mulder and Scully return to their new basement office, they discover truth is illusive as ever and some things never change. Author's Note: Based on what I saw in the movie, I think Mulder and Scully have moved to a new dimension in their relationship. Who knows if Chris Carter will do? But then that's half the fun, isn't it? Acknowledge The Corn by Denise A. Agnew writer@agnewdt.demon.co.uk X-Files Basement Office Tuesday, July 21 8:00am Back in the basement. Back where it all started five years ago. Scully walked down the hallway, her eyesight adjusting to the sting of the florescent lights. Dim, the white light left the hall in a half hidden eerie ambiance that could have made it's own X-File. She felt a comfort in being within the murkiness. Familiarity. She needed the dull, the ordinary, the things around her never changing. At least for a little while. Until she retrieved an indomitable sense of balance. One of the lights flickered and she winced. Ever since she'd been cloistered for hours in the gloom of the cavern in Antarctica, in the darkness of the "craft," her eyes sometimes rejected bright light. As another side effect of her strange internment, her temples started a steady, annoying throb. Headaches, the doctors said, that might be tension. Who wouldn't be stressed after everything she'd been through? Used to pressure, used to extremes, she didn't like the fact she might be having stress headaches. If she could beat cancer she could damn well beat headaches. Maybe even those little spidery, broken blood vessels in her cheeks would disappear soon and the odd, dark hollow in her eyes would drop away. She had to get that old spark back before it faded completely. Sure, she'd encouraged Mulder to continue his search for the truth, just as he had begged her not to leave the X-Files... Even the memory of being in that hallway...of being within inches of something so profound it brought tears to her eyes- Until the bee sting had taken the moment away from her. No. Better not explore. Better not go where the deepest danger resided. She stopped at the door to the office...the clean, new, soot free door that proclaimed Fox Mulder lived here. She looked again at the name plate. Dana Scully. Dana Scully was printed, sure as day, right under his name. Shock held her still as marble. Surely not. Some things in the X-Files world never changed, and one thing that didn't budge was Mulder's insistence on a sense of permanence in the office. While his world went chaotic, his office would remain the same. His last link with sanity. Perhaps that had been the main reason the narcosis of seeing the burned office had been so great for him. All the material perpetuity had been stripped. Totally and completely. They could have burned his apartment. They could have burned the entire FBI Headquarters...but leave his office alone. Maybe even Mulder could change. A sign with her name nestled to his could signal adjustment. A new step in a new direction. For a moment, as she waited, barely moving, a myriad of memories flew back. "Why don't I have a desk?" She remembered the day she'd asked him. She recalled the sharp, specific pain she'd felt when he'd walked out the door after saying maybe they needed time away from each other. She remembered her battle not to call him when she'd been half certain Ed Jerse had murdered the girl and that ergot poisoning had caused Ed's psychotic behavior. Yet even then, like now, she didn't know anything for certain. Except, perhaps, for one thing. A loud blast of music jarred her risky thoughts and she jumped, startled by the noise coming from the office. Taking a deep breath, she opened the door to... ZZ Top. She's got legs. Smiling slightly she marveled at how rejuvenating a good blast of rock and roll could be. Mulder had installed a stereo with speakers on a shelf above his computer. With his back turned to her, he tapped out something on the computer, his fingers flying over the keys. "Mulder." He didn't move a muscle. "Mulder!" He about came off his chair, swinging around with his mouth hanging open and his eyes a little wide. When he saw her his lips barely tilted up in a smile...just enough to show he might be embarrassed. He reached up and turned the radio off. She didn't move into the office. Instead she looked around, taking in the way he'd replaced practically everything that had gone up in smoke. Including the I WANT TO BELIEVE poster. "I can't believe you, Mulder." He stood, holding his hands out to the room. "What's not to believe?" "This office." She took a tentative step into the room, crossing the threshold, hearing the one footfall echo. "Your photographic memory at work?" He nodded and came from behind the desk, his gaze following her as she took a few more steps in. "That and a little help from the Lone Gunman. Langley has this phobia about bad luck coming to anyone who doesn't put stuff back in the same place...exactly where they last placed it. Hence, he remembers every detail of where everything was in the office. He made sure I got stuff right." "Then I'm in big trouble." "You? The Scully I know is tidy." Of course, he was right. She was tidy. And that clean cut way of doing things helped her now. Her home stayed orderly, and when her mind threatened to wander, she could slam it back to where it belonged. She looked into the corner and noticed something had changed. Her desk... Bigger, better...fancy. She walked toward it, touching the surface of the dark, obviously expensive wood and noted the quality far surpassed Mulder's metal pulpit. Far more expensive, ridiculously so. She turned to look at him, and his attentive gaze caught her off guard. She swallowed hard. "This desk is great, but why is it so...big...so..." "Ostentatious." "Exactly. Why didn't you take this desk?" "Don't you think you deserve it?" "A desk, yes, but not a Rolls Royce model." Without blinking an eyelash, he said, "You deserve it, Scully. You deserve a lot more." A lot more of what? She could have asked. Could have opened her mouth and let the words slip. Something stopped her. The same old something that always stopped her. Self-protection. The unquenchable knowledge she could never be hurt if she didn't let anyone in. Keep Mulder back where he belongs. For anything would be safer than speaking the truth to him. A deeper truth than anything she'd ever spoken to anyone. Had almost spoken back in the hallway-- "I thought this place needed a little fashion statement," Mulder said when she didn't reply. "Before it was early nineties efficiency model. Now it's almost the same, but with modifications." She gazed directly into his eyes and saw it there. Just like us. We're the same, with modifications. Physical and mental. "Thank you," she said, knowing that more words wouldn't come, and anything extra wouldn't be what he expected. He swung back to his desk and sat down as if his legs wouldn't hold him. She knew the weakness. They might have had time to recover from the ordeal, but something lingered, as all the five years between them loitered like unspoken promises. "How's the head?" he asked, and she realized she'd been squinting in the bright light. "Still the same. Bright light hurts and my headaches continue. It will take time to disperse." He nodded toward the door. "At least they did as I asked and kept florescent lighting out of the place. Check out the light switch next to the door. It's one of those adjustable things." She twitched one eyebrow and sauntered back to the door. She turned the switch slowly and the lighting grew very dim. "And exactly how are you suppose to see anything in this lighting?" Mulder shrugged and let that tiny slanting smile part his lips for a millisecond. "I guess I could always bring my girlfriends down here for a party." Giving in to a full fledged smile, she turned the lights up a tad more. Walking toward his desk, she said, "You can do anything you like in here, Mulder. This is your office." His smile disappeared. "It isn't just my office. It's never been just my office since you walked in the door five years ago." How could the atmosphere in a room change to quickly? "But you set this all up. If it was my office, too, you would have asked me what I wanted. Instead you went ahead and did it all. Without telling me-" "Stop." His softly spoken word shook her and got the result he wanted. She stopped and stared at him, waiting. Trying to read the hard light in his eyes and the real meaning behind his closed expression. "I thought we'd gotten beyond all that, Scully." "Beyond what? We still have work to do. We still have to find the truth-" "No. That isn't what I mean." She hadn't imagined this scenario when she woke this morning. When she knew she had to go into work and face the day as if nothing had ever happened and that old times meant good times. What did she do when old memories felt so good...even with their blanket of skullduggery and pain attached? It wasn't as if she could start from scratch and kid herself every minute of the day and every moment of her life from then on. Change was inevitable, and she'd better step forward and embrace it and take it with both hands open. Otherwise the waiting...the constant wondering would drive her insane. Mulder stood and moved around the desk and came to a halt in front of her. Familiar. As familiar as the ten thousand other times he'd stood in front of her. This time, however, the light silvering his hair, made him look older and younger at the same time, gave him a solid sheet of vulnerability. Turned his eyes darker than they'd ever been. Before he could speak she thought of a subject yet unresolved. "How is Diana?" "Still in a coma. They don't know if she'll ever recover." She nodded. "I'm sorry, Mulder." "About what?" "For you. For Diana." "Why be sorry for me?" She couldn't say it. Couldn't repeat what she knew. How could she tell Mulder she'd gone behind his back and asked the Lone Gunman what she couldn't ask Mulder herself. Diana had been his "chickadee." "She's your...friend...your old partner." He nodded, but his expression remained neutral. "Old partner." "She didn't deserve what happened." "No. But then you didn't deserve what happened to you." "I was in the wrong place at the wrong time, Mulder, just like Diana." "They were after her just as they were after you. But they didn't try and kill Diana to get to me. Your situation was entirely different." "The bee sting was by chance. It just as easily could have been you stung by that bee." He shook his head and leaned back against the desk, sitting on the edge. "No, I don't believe that." "Then what do you believe?" Straightening, he towered over her, looking down from his superior height. But instead of being intimidated, as many others would be, she found a comfort in this other common denominator in their relationship. "You know why they took you instead of me, don't you? "Why?" He put his hands on her shoulders, squeezed lightly, and she felt her own heart constrict with the movement. "Think, Scully. Don't stand there and deny your memories." Ah, yes. The third side effect of her time in Antarctica. Memory loss. End of Part One Acknowledge The Corn (2/2) by Denise A. Agnew writer@agnewdt.demon.co.uk The memory of the bee sting hit her like a brick in the face. Scully felt her throat tighten, and for one horrible moment she imagined the ghastly sensation of being dizzy, of her heart pounding, of not being able to catch her breath. A delayed reaction. She sucked in a sharp breath, and his fingers tightened, sliding down her arms. He bent to look more closely at her face, then tipped her chin up with his finger. Worry lines etched his forehead. "Scully?" She sucked in another breath, ragged and incomplete, and she saw his expression go from worry to the panic of the time in the hallway... "Scully-God, what's wrong? Are you sick?" She shook her head, but mouthed the word screaming through her mind. Mulder. His fingers left her chin and suddenly his hands cupped her face. "Breathe, damn it. Take a deep breath for me." Her thoughts went back to when she'd passed out in the space craft, and how she'd awakened, choking, inhaling air with a gasp. Now, she absorbed the second breath, this time deep and easy, and the constriction in her lungs left immediately. "I'm sorry," she said, gasping once. "I...the memory of the sting." The breath she'd taken for him hadn't improved the expression on his face. Solid fright registered in his eyes, threatening to fix there permanently. "Are you all right?" he asked. "Yes. The therapist I went to at the Employee Assistance Program said I might have trouble with flashbacks for awhile. A little Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome." He cursed under his breath and closed his eyes for a second. His hands dropped away, and he stuffed his hands in his pants pockets. "Don't scare me like that, Scully." "I...I didn't know it was going to happen." "Then don't think about it. Don't think about what happened in the hall way." But she couldn't forget one moment. Of the fear and sadness she'd felt mixed with the pleasure of being embraced, of having the comfort they gave to each other. Of having him say what he'd never admitted before. Telling her he wouldn't go on. Couldn't go on without her. They must have stared at each other for a solid minute before he shifted, taking his hands out of his pockets and shoving them both through his hair. He looked totally rattled. "Mulder." He looked up. "Mulder, if we want to move forward, if we want to get to the truth we have to get passed our insecurities. We have to find a way to work around them or over them." "There are some things a person can't get over. You know that. They just hide them. Pretend they aren't there." Funny how Mulder could seem to read her mind, yet leave just enough obtuseness to make her wonder if it was all her imagination. "What do you need to get over Mulder?" "I need to get over the bee stinging you and the way you looked when you told me something was wrong." She'd tried so hard to pretend all right. She'd striven to mislead herself into thinking they hadn't almost- "Scully, I thought you were dying. And it was worse than when you lay in that hospital bed with cancer eating away at you. Much worse." She stepped forward and put her hand on his arm, and felt the muscle tense as she touched him. "Why?" He covered her hand with his, held it against the heat and hardness of the skin and blood and muscle beneath. "Because if you'd died they would have won. I would have stopped chasing after the truth because without you there is no truth." She sighed and looked at the I WANT TO BELIEVE poster, and wanted to scream out loud exactly the same thing. Tears surged to her eyes. Somehow since she'd been stung by the bee, tears came to her more easily. She couldn't speak for a long time. Instead she fought the urge to cry until her eyeballs ached with the effort. "No. I think you would have gone on. They underestimate you time and again. They do not know how much this means to you to discover the entire truth. Because they are not as strong as you. No one is as strong as you, Mulder." "No, I'm not--" "Promise me one thing." Slowly he nodded. "If anything happens to me again, and you can't save me...go on alone. Don't you dare quit. Fight on until the very end." "Scully-" "Promise me." He nodded again, and she saw a deep sadness cover his eyes at the same time. "You've got something that lives on...beyond anyone's death. Your father died and it didn't stop you from continuing your search for the truth." His fingers tightened on her hand. "As much as I loved my father, his death didn't...it didn't mean what you-" "No." With a tight throat she said, "We do have one truth, Mulder, that they can never take away. And it would have existed whether I had died or not. Whether you hadn't found me and saved my life with the vaccine." The smile started in his eyes and glowed, moving to his lips. He knew and she knew, and that was all that mattered. The phone rang, and when Mulder released her hand and he reached for the phone, she felt the familiarity come back again. She could go on from this point with no doubts. Whatever the next case led them she had an assurance she'd never had before. Mulder put down the phone and turned to her, the old twinkle back in his eyes. "Skinner wants to see us in his office. He's got a new case for us." As they headed for the door she said, "As long as it doesn't have anything to do with bees and corn crops I'll be happy." "Acknowledge the corn." She made a tiny scoffing noise, mingled in with a disbelieving laugh. "What?" "Acknowledge the corn. It's an old saying used frequently in the last century. It means to admit the truth." There would be a day when they could speak the ultimate truth, but now wasn't the time. Not yet. Not just yet. The End -- Denise A. Agnew "I cannot forget the follies and vices of others so soon as I ought, nor their offences against myself...my temper would perhaps be called resentful. My good opinion once lost is lost forever." Mr. Darcy, PRIDE AND PREJUDICE