Title: Keeper Author: PhileyX E-Mail: phileyx@yahoo.com Web-site: http://www.angelfire.com/id/phileyx Rating: PG-R Category: MSR, Will/Joyce RST. Spoilers: Requiem Prequels: Man Without A Face, The Matchbox, The Dinner Guest, A Nobody is Hard to Find, Time Out, Redhead, A Father is Hard To Find, Visions, Second Time Round Disclaimer: All the characters here do not belong to me. Excerpts from the song 'Acoustic #3' by The Goo Goo Dolls. No infringement of copyright intended. Author's note: The prequels to this story can be found at: http://www.angelfire.com/id/phileyx/Face.html http://www.angelfire.com/id/phileyx/Matchbox.html http://www.angelfire.com/id/phileyx/Dinner.html http://www.angelfire.com/id/phileyx/Nobody.html http://www.angelfire.com/id/phileyx/Timeout.html http://www.angelfire.com/id/phileyx/Redhead.html http://www.angelfire.com/id/phileyx/Father.html http://www.angelfire.com/id/phileyx/Visions.html http://www.angelfire.com/id/phileyx/Secondtime.html If the format is screwed up, try reading from my site: http://www.angelfire.com/id/phileyx/Keeper.html Intro: This story takes place after the Requiem. Two years after his disappearance, a man appears claiming to be Mulder, with a catch; he just didn't have his face. Scully finds out he really is her ex- partner the unconventional way. Now the consortium is after their only son and she is forced to make the ultimate sacrifice; she gives them both up. Although intent on keeping herself away from her son, she is unable to stop herself from seeing Mulder. Will grows up without her and soon without his father too. Uncertain about his past, he struggles to understand the signs along his way, signs that would lead him to the truth and eventually his destiny. XXXXXXXXXXX Keeper (Part One of One) Joyce glanced at her watch. Her client was late. 'Very late.' She thought irritably, thinking how it would throw the rest of her schedule out of whack. Actually, she wasn't really surprised. Somehow she knew it would be a sucky day. She knew the moment Jason spilled milk all over her files this morning. And the man didn't even have the decency to apologize or help to clean up the mess. Instead he stole a piece of toast from her plate and rushed out the door. Just thinking about it made her grit her teeth in frustration. After his manly attempt of intimidation last Christmas, Joyce wasn't so sure about herself anymore. She knew that Jason being Jason was just fooling around, yet his kiss lingered in her mind like a bad tune. It wasn't as if it meant anything to her, it was just well, fantastic. It had been a long time since any guy had kissed her like that. And that fact drove her crazy. It just couldn't be possible that the best kiss she had ever received in her entire life would be a practical joke from her best friend! It was so degrading! It was just plain sad! So as soon as she reached Chicago, she unpacked her dancing shoes and began dating again. But never in her widest dreams did she expect Jason to be transferred to Chicago. His sudden assignment to Chicago barely allowed him to pack, much less to look for a place to stay, so he bunked in with her. Initially, she had thought of sharing her apartment with him permanently but thought of Linda and scraped the idea. She figured his girlfriend certainly wouldn't be too happy to hear of it. Thankfully after two months, he finally found a place of his own. For Jason, the abrupt change in location had been rather unsettling. It was too much of a coincidence that he was transferred to where she was. As usual he had a theory and a list of suspects, namely his father or hospital bureaucrats who didn't like an idea of a genius among their midst. But what surprised Joyce the most was that he even included Agent Scully to the list of usual suspects. Okay, so she had been playing hide and seek with him since her accident. But still, what possible reason could she have for having him leave DC? Besides, the woman just went though a traumatic accident and was nearly killed. It was natural for her to take a couple of months leave of absence. Unfortunately, Jason wasn't convinced and Joyce had given up trying to. These days, she had begun to notice an amendment to his disposition. It was difficult to handle him lately. He seemed preoccupied and restless. When she asked, he denied that anything was wrong. And that truly was both annoying and mind-boggling. Considering they had grown up together, she would think he would have more sense than to lie to her. There was definitely something bothering him. But he just wouldn't talk. If he wasn't at the hospital, he was mooching about her apartment. After a brief visit to his place one day, she concluded practically that it was only because her fridge contained food. It certainly could not be for her company. He hardly said a word most of the time and if he did, it was only to irritate her. It had come to a point that they argued more than they talked. It was as if their relationship had hit a brick wall somewhere. And she just couldn't understand why. Sighing, she glanced at her watch again, half an hour gone. 'That's it, I'm out of here!' She told herself and got to her feet. The hotel lobby was brimming with people and she wondered what the occasion was. Looking at the professional attire of most of the patrons, she could only guess that there was a convention of some sort. As she walked across the carpeted hall, she passed a temporary booth. Curious, she peered across for a clue. She was spared the trouble when a man walked up to her, thinking she was one of the attendees and passed her a flyer. "There had been some changes to the schedule." He told her and moved on to the next person behind her. She looked at the piece of paper in her hand. 'Annual FSRTC Forensic Science Forum.' She read silently and automatically flipped it over to see the amended schedule it highlighted. Her eyes immediately focused on the one name she recognized. 'SAC Dana Scully - A lecture on the standardization of forensic practices among scientific and law enforcement agencies. Also a brief introduction to quality assurance and proficiency test guidelines for examiners and laboratories of specialized working groups and forensic community. 2.30pm in the Hall A.' Joyce eyes widened. 'Agent Scully is here? In Chicago?' Retracing her steps, she made her way to the reception. "Excuse me." She caught the front desk officer's attention. "Is there a Dana Scully residing in this hotel?" The man didn't even look at his records when he answered. "Yes, there is." She almost smiled. Jason was right, the agent certainly knew how to make her presence known. "Would you mind telling me what room she's in?" Again he didn't bat an eyelid when he answered. "I believe it is Room 422, Maam." "Thank you." He quickly interrupted her intent of leaving. "But I do believe Agent Scully is at present not in her room. She just stepped out about five minutes ago." Joyce raised an eyebrow. "Do you know where she's headed?" The man in uniform looked slightly apprehensive to answer and she quickly changed her question. "Did she leave in a Taxi?" He seemed more inclined to answer now. "No, I believe Agent Scully had rented a car and was headed in the direction of the car park." 'Good, she just might be able to catch her.' Joyce thought and fished out a twenty for the helpful man. 'Hopefully, Agent Scully would to able to shed some light on why Jason was turning into a grouch.' XXXXXXXXXXX Dana's heels clicked loudly in the quiet car park. It unnerved her somehow and she took a deep breath to compose herself. 'It was just tension.' She thought and then wondered. 'Or was it guilt?' It had been two months since she last seen her son. And she had been doing rather well considering the enormity of the catastrophic event. After being discharged, she took a long break from work, taking the time to visit her brothers and even visiting other relatives that she had not seen for ions of years. She kept herself busy and far away from DC, knowing that the Gunmen would be making the necessary arrangements to remove him from her life. But just when she thought she was succeeding in getting on with her life, she faltered. In a teensy weensy moment of weakness, her resolve lost. It all happened in Bill's home a couple of weeks ago while she was opening her forwarded mail. It was an official invitation to give a lecture in the FSRTC symposium. And of all cities, it was to be held in Chicago. She found herself rereading the letter thrice, not believing her eyes. The twist of fate was just so amazing that she wondered if it were sign from God. After all, didn't everything happen for a reason? In her defense, she did try. She raved at herself for days, slipping into silent mind battles between her rationale and maternal alter egos. And as her face contorted with the repercussions of her quiet internal war, Bill worriedly began questioning her sanity. But ultimately, she just could not resist the temptation and decided to risk it. After all, she had a good reason to be in Chicago. Surely she could sneak in a peek at her son without getting caught? So she called HQ and committed herself to the deed. But now that she was in the same city as he was, her confidence was shot to zero. She shook visibly, her pulse was irregular and her face was pale. She had lost count of the number of agents that asked her if she was all right throughout the morning sessions. And for the thousandth time, she wondered if it was safe for Jason for her to be near her. She took a deep breath as her thoughts flew back to he present. The numbered pillar nearby marked the location of her rented sedan and she walked faster towards it. As she took a left after passing the lighted column, she abruptly bumped into a dark figure behind its shadows. Automatically, she reached for her gun in a flustered manner but the sound of his voice stopped her. "Going somewhere, Scully?" Dole's gaze was nonchalant with a tinge of mock curiosity. She instantly relaxed and her hand that was halfway in her up her jacket dropped. On the verge of telling him off for half scaring her out of her wits, she suddenly remembered her sly mission and the guilt immediately returned, causing her to blush slightly. He seemed to enjoy her disconcertment. She frowned, wondering why she found it annoying. Then realization hit. It became obvious that it was no coincidence he was here just when she was on her way to see Will. He knew perfectly well that she would give him hell for abandoning their son and had cleverly picked the perfect moment to show himself. The precise moment when she herself was about to go against their agreed set of rules. 'The snake!' She thought as her fists clenched tightly as anger replaced her annoyance. He seemed to realize that she was on to him and his smirk instantaneously vanished. But he refused to be intimidated and asked her again. "Where are you going, Scully?" Dana lifted her head a little and he recognized the motion. The redhead was preparing to defend herself to the very end, even if it killed her. He sighed internally, hoping he had enough strength to wear out her excuses. She did not disappoint him, answering him defiantly. "You know very well where I'm going." He kept his voice neutral but firm. "You can't." "Well it really isn't my fault, is it?" She shot back. "You were supposed to keep him away from me! If anyone's to blame, it's you Dole!" He shook his head. "He's a grown man, Scully. I couldn't have possibly controlled his movements." Her blue eyes burned. "No. That's right you couldn't. You lost that right when you walked out on him!" 'Ah yes.' Dole resisted an urge to smile. He was wondering when she would get to that. "I was recognized." She took a moment to consider his explanation. "Sorry Dole, not good enough." "Even if it was Krycek?" He challenged. Her voice rose and she stepped closer. "Especially if it was Krycek! He was in college, he was just a kid! What if Krycek got to him?" "I wouldn't let him." Then, he imitated her action, taking a step towards her and firmly locking her eyes with his. "I had no choice, believe me!" The fierce intensity of his claim quietened her anger. And he took the opportunity to explain further. "Krycek knew what Will would turn out to be. The SOB checked out every boy within that age range that showed a higher degree of intellect. What he hadn't counted on was that I would hold Will back. And that bought us time. Throughout the years, the rat was relentless in his search. He spent more time in airports, waiting for the next flight to his next suspect than he spent time watching you. That's why I was so confident that meeting up with you would not pose to be a problem. But one day my luck ran out. As you now know we live in quite a small town. Once in a while, I would drive into the city for a couple of ....er rr.....hard-to-find household supplies." He hesitated and hastily then continued." Anyway one trip, I was at one of the shopping malls when Krycek spotted me. He came after me but I managed to give him the slip in the crowd." If he was expecting her to be contented, he was bitterly disappointed. Dana was incredulous. "That's it? That's why our abandoned our son? Because Krycek caught you on your branded sunflower seed shopping spree?" He winced when she guessed right but went straight to the point. "I was grocery shopping, Scully! That was indication enough that I wasn't residing far from there. And Krycek would not have left out the smaller towns within the vicinity as well. He may have very well checked them out first to eliminate the possibility." She protested. "Oh for God's sakes, the odds of finding you based by sight would be enormous!" "Oh we're talking about odds now, are we?" He snorted sardonically. "In the first place, the probability that he would see me in that mall at that particular moment was a billion to one and yet, he still did!" He saw her begin to argue and quickly drew up another example. "What about Will being assigned to DC for his internship? What were the chances of that happening, Scully? Call me paranoid, but I'd say our betting days are over." Her face told him that her silence did to mean that she was convinced. Gritting his teeth, he went on with his convictions. "It wasn't an easy decision for me. But like you, twenty years ago, I had to. It was the perfect defense, the one move that Krycek would never expect me to make. It just wouldn't make any sense to him. After all the trouble we went through to keep Will safe, he would never guess that we would eventually ditch him." Her voice dripped with scarsam in her quick retort. "Oh so it did occur to you that what you did was absurd? Well, that's a relief! I thought I was the only one who saw abandoning our teenage son to be bad judgment. Or perhaps I have more claim considering I spent twelve excruciating painful hours in labour with him?" He ignored her. "The fact is Scully, you and I are Will's liability. We are his proof of identity. Krycek doesn't have a clue what he looks like. So the further we stay away from our son, the better his chances are of not being found." "You know what, Dole? Too fucking bad!" She forcefully. "Don't you think it's too late for that now? He exposed himself to danger the second he took his internship in DC." She frowned as something else struck her. "And a doctor? Couldn't you have encouraged him to be a fireman or something?" He nearly smiled. "It's the Irish blood in him, I think. A natural tendency towards holding a scalpel and barking orders at people." It was all she could do from punching him in the eye. "You are so not off the hook yet. But right now I'm done talking to you." She glared and turned to leave. His hand shot out, catching her wrist with an iron grip and whirling her towards his chest. "You can't do this, Scully!" He growled in desperation. "You know you can't. It's why you walked away two months ago in the first place!" She gritted her teeth and snarled back. "Don't remind me the reason why I had to because it will only piss me off further!" Twisting her arm to loosen his clutch, she hissed. "I was prepared to let him go before I got too involved but you pushed me to him, you pressed me to care...." He interrupted her. "Because at that time he needed you." "And you're damned lucky he only started having visions after he graduated!" Her blue eyes flashed, telling him she would do more than kill him if Will's trouble with the supernatural began when he had no one to turn to, a few years ago. He shook his head. "That wasn't a coincidence. Don't you get it? You were the one that triggered his powers back to life." She was flabbergasted. "What?" "Think about it, Scully. He was psychic as a child and yet after we left DC, he showed no signs that he retained the ability. He may have been just two at that time but he lost his mother. For a kid, that's traumatic. Somewhere along line, without us noticing it, he left a part of him behind. **That** particular part of him behind. With you." As his words sank into her and begin to make sense, Dana's felt herself weaken against him. Somehow his hands had made their way at her back, gently touching her. "He began seeing again when he stepped into your house. I don't know how or why. Perhaps he recognized being there before, in a subconscious level and it subsequently prompted his suppressed gift out to the open. Or perhaps it was just you." She listened numbly. There were tears stinging the back of her lips and she felt completely disorientated. What had happened? Just a moment ago, she was livid at Dole. A moment ago, she was ready to shoot him if he stood in her way between her son a second longer. A moment ago, she knew exactly what she wanted. And now, she had absolutely no idea what that was. Snippets of Dole's words wandered into her mind. 'Don't you get it? You were the one that triggered his powers back to life.' Had she? Was she the reason her son was losing his normal life after they had struggled so hard to give him one? But whose fault was it really? Shouldn't it be Dole's for not guiding Will away from DC? Then again, their son had already decided on medicine and he was posted to DC so he had no control over that decision. In her utter confusion, she did not realize that her face was pressed against Dole's heart. The steady beat beneath her cheek offered slight comfort as she felt his arms tighten around her. She took a deep breath of his scent and pushed her thoughts away for a while. "I'm sorry." He whispered in her hair, his voice pained with emotions. Hearing him, she knew that he understood exactly what she was feeling. 'Actually, he'd been there and done that.' She thought. Her twenty years of not knowing was bliss compared to his five years of restraint after he took off. Her hopes suddenly soared. 'Of course!' Dole was no stranger to the temptation of what she was about to do. He would understand and perhaps indulge her, just this once. So she sought his approval with a desperate appeal. "I just want to see him, Dole. I don't even have to talk to him." He froze, cursing internally. She was making this more difficult than he ever imagined it to be. Steeling himself not to concede, he gently told her. "Let him go, Scully." She trembled when she heard his reluctant but ruthless advice. And fresh tears trickled down her cheeks and onto his shirt. He closed his eyes, wishing he could carry her agonizing burden instead of her. Suddenly, she pushed him away from her, making him stagger back. Without a word, she walked away, palming away her tears as she did. It was just too much, she could not bear to stay a moment longer. To let him hold her and comfort her even though he wouldn't even allow her the simplest satisfaction that could save her. "Scully!" He called out to her. She walked faster and turned into the light. In her distress, she nearly bumped into someone for second time that night. Blinking, she stared at the young woman sheepishly standing in front of her. "Who.... who are you?" The lady grimaced, telling her that she had intruded and probably overhead her private conversation with Dole. "Agent Scully? I...." Her voice trailed off abruptly and she stared past Dana, towards who she assumed to be Dole. But the shock on the young redhead's face was so apparent that the older redhead realized that something was not right. And it became even more suspicious when she stuttered. "Mr.. Mr. ..V..." Dana raised an eyebrow and turned to look at him comically. "Mr. V?" Dole had visibly paled but he still shot his lover a warning glare and turned to their eavesdropper. "Hello Joyce." 'Joyce?' Dana balked. 'Joyce Callahan?' And Dole's look answered her. She closed her eyes and grimaced. 'Oh no!' Joyce opened her mouth, closed it and then tried talking again. "You... you know each other?" Dana's pain took a pause and she bit her lip, wondering would be the best answer to give. But Dole graciously took the matter from her hands. He nodded at her. "I'll take care of this. Go." Dana frowned a 'Are you sure question?' And he nodded again. Shooting a sheepish 'good luck', she walked off. Joyce did not even realize her departure, still too mesmerized with the sight of the man that a couple of years ago, had vanished mysteriously from the face of the earth. Her mind raced with a million questions she wanted to ask, a thousand things she wanted to tell him and a dozen really nasty names she wanted to call him. But she waited instead. "How long have you been standing there, Joyce?" She drew in a deep breath and asked again firmly. "How do you know her, Mr. V? Or is it Dole?" He almost rolled his eyes. For a moment, he wondered what horrific deeds had he done in his past life that rendered him dealing with two pissed off redheads in one night and back to back too. Then, dropping his voice to a gentle whisper, he tried calming her down. "Joyce, listen to..." She interrupted him, flinging her words at him like missiles. "Don't even try patronizing me, Mr. V! Just cut the crap and tell me the truth! How do you know her?" He stiffened, recognizing that she was way beyond any psychological tactic he was familiar with. At least previously, he had an edge with Scully but with Joyce, he had nothing. "We were once partners." "And who's Will?" Hesitating, he twisted the truth. "Agent Scully's son." She nodded. Although she had walked in the middle of the heated exchange, she had caught enough bits and pieces to vaguely make out a picture. And everything else that was weird in Jason's life was also beginning to fall into place. "Okay, so Will is her son. And yet, the both of you talked as if he is your son too." He remained silent and her blue eyes intensified. "Correct me if I'm wrong. If the both of you share the same son and as far as I'm concerned, you only have one son who is Jason Alexander; that would make Will, Jason and Agent Scully, Jason's mother." She finished triumphantly and sarcastically added. "How did I do? Do I get to pick a door for getting it right?" He sighed. 'It was no use.' She had stood there long enough to figure it out. The question was what should he do about her now? He tried to reason with her. "Joyce, if Jason found out about this, how do you think he'd react?" She smirked. "Let's find out, shall we?" And she made to move. "No, wait!" Dole panicked and thought quickly for a good reason. "If you told Jason, he will not rest until he uncovered the truth." Her eyes lit back angrily. "And doesn't he deserve that? For God's sakes, it's his life!" "If he confronts Scully or does anything else that warrants suspicion, Krycek will find him!" "Just who the hell is Krycek? And what does he want from Jason?" He ignored her first question but answered the second. "I don't know what he wants but it has something to do with the visions." "I don't understand...." "I don't either. And that's why Jason can't know because he won't stand for that. You know how he is; he'll drive himself to the edge to find out why, what and how. And when he does, he's bound to attract attention." She shook her head incredulously. "For something you have absolutely no clue about, you sure went through a whole lot of trouble keeping it from him." "Joyce, please." Dole found himself reduced to pleading with her. "You can't tell him anything." She gazed at him in silence for a while, then shook her head. "I'm sorry. But I'm all Jason's got left and I refuse to lie to him. I will not become you." Her words sliced into his conscious like a knife but he forced himself to think clearly. Somehow, he had to stop Joyce from walking away and destroying everything that they had fought so hard for. He called out to her. "Fine, go ahead Joyce! Go tell him!" Her step slowed and a tinge of hope flickered. "You go tell him that his father is here in Chicago, only twenty minutes away and yet, doesn't want to see him! Tell him that his mother is not dead, that she's Agent Scully but she refuses acknowledge him! You go tell him that, Joyce!" Joyce closed her eyes tightly as her imagination gave her a glimpse of what the news might do to Jason. And her heart fell. Mr. V or whatever his name really is, was right. It would destroy Jason completely. She forced her sudden tears back. Without turning around, she hissed. "Why are you doing this to him?" He smiled sadly. "The same reason why you can't bring yourself to tell him. We love him too much." He heard her small mocking laugh but did not respond. It was enough that she had more or less agreed to not say a word. And Dole realized that he should go before she had time to change her mind or ask more questions he could not answer. Quietly, he bade her goodbye. "He needs you, Joyce. Take care of him." She blinked twice and turned around hastily. Her eyes widened, watching Jason's father walk briskly away. "Wait!" She called out. "You can't do this to me! You have to give me at least one good reason!" "I did." He answered without turning around. "And it's the only reason you need, Joyce." "Wait!" She strode after him. "Mr. V! Dole!" But as he disappeared from her view, she stopped her chase and muttered a curse. He had won. Somehow, he had cleverly turned the tables and made her into a co-conspirator. And she wondered if she would be able to live it down. XXXXXXXXXXX Jason's mind wandered off as he stared blankly at the top of her coffee table. Linda watched him, thoughtfully. He had been distant all night, as if that there was something at the back of his head but he couldn't tell what. There were moments where he remembered himself and was attentive but it wasn't long before he began staring into nothingness. And something told her he was thinking about Chicago. "Are you okay?" She finally asked him, causing him to start and snap him head up. "Yes." He smiled a small smile. "Why do you ask?" "It's just that you look as if something's bothering you." He frowned and hesitated for a while. "I was just wishing I could come back here, to DC." She watched his eyes carefully. "Why?" Surprised that she asked, he gave her an odd look. "Because you're here, of course." "Yeah, but you've got Joyce there." He smirked but she did not miss the quick twitch on his face before he answered. "She may be my best friend but you, my dear, are my girlfriend, are you not?" Linda drew in a short breath. She had been putting off wanting to talk about their relationship for months now. And maybe the time had come. "Jason? Where do you think our relationship is going? "What do you mean?" She sighed and explained slowly. "I love my job here and I don't think I'll leave it anytime soon. And you're in Chicago for another three years. I just think that it's a long distance between these two cities." His eyes widened. "Are you breaking up with me?" "No. I'm asking you if we're gonna get anywhere with this relationship." "Of course we are. At least I thought we are. What's wrong with this relationship?" She almost gaped. "Jason, you don't .... talk to me." His face was skeptical. "Sure I do..." "No, you don't." She interrupted. "I don't know anything about your family." She knew she had made her point when his face changed. But she felt that she had to say it all before she lost her nerve. "I know your mother died when you were just a baby but I don't know how she died. And you almost never mention your father. Hell, I don't even know what he does for a living! And then there's Joyce." Jason lifted an eyebrow. "Joyce?" "I don't know how to put this to you or how you'll take it but I want to be honest so here goes. I know Joyce is your best friend and that she's has been since you were like... I don't know, five?" "Three." She frowned and nodded. "Right. The thing is, I know that she knows everything about you. I understand that and I've tried to accept it. But as far as we're concerned, she still remains closer to you than I will ever seem to be. And I find that disturbing." He looked at her expressively. "Okay. So what do you want from me, Linda? You want me to stop talking to Joyce? Because I think that's happening already." She looked at him, unsure. "What do you mean?" "These days, she's too busy with her job and her new boyfriend to know I exist." Linda studied his nonchalant face but was not fooled. It was evident that it bothered him, perhaps it was the reason he seemed overly preoccupied this weekend. Jason then seemed to recall her previous accusations and asked her. "And you want to know about my life? Fine, I'll tell you." His gruff voice lowered. "Shall I begin with my mother?" Linda could not bear his intense pained look and held her hand to his lips to stop him. She shook her head and whispered. "Don't." He took her hand away gently. "You wanted to know." "I wanted you to tell me because you want to. Not because I had put you in a spot." Her hand gripped his and she squeezed lightly. "Go home, Jason. Think about what you want from me. If you don't want me in your life, I'd appreciate the head start before I... before we both get hurt anymore than necessary." He stared at her as her words sank in. She had given him an ultimatum, he realized. And he wondered if he had the guts to believe that she would take her chances with him if he did let her in. After all, hadn't all who truly learnt the real Jason Alexander ended up walking away? XXXXXXXXXXX Joyce heard her door unlock and she looked up in surprise. Her astonishment increased when Jason walked in. His face told her that he hadn't expected her to be in either. "Jace! What are you doing back?" Shouldn't he be in DC with Linda? "I cut my trip short." He simply replied. "I thought you would be working." She blushed slightly, thinking of the excuse she had made up for the past few weeks to stay away from her house, where he always seemed to be. "It was a good week." He nodded thoughtfully and slowly slid his travel bag on the floor. Joyce studied his tired eyes and haggard appearance and wondered if it was because of the flight or the reason he cut short his trip. Then, she looked away and busied herself with clearing away the half eaten tub of ice cream and cookies on her coffee table. She still had not been able to comfortably remain in his presence without thinking about her silent betrayal. And after weeks of working overtime and staying out later than usual with her dates with Jonathan, she had looked forward to his planned weekend trip to visit Linda. It was supposed to be her few days of rest. But now, he had destroyed it by returning. Annoyed, she couldn't help but ask. "You still have your bag so you didn't go home first. Your first stop is my place although you didn't expect me to be in?" He winced slightly but quickly covered it up by reaching for his bag. A rummage later, he revealed a tiny cooler box. "I thought I'd put this in your freezer before it melted." His voice was chilly and then he walked past her to the kitchen. As remorse set in, Joyce groaned and kicked her sofa in frustration. 'Oh great! He brought me ice cream and I had to go behave like a bitch!' It was probably her favourite flavour. Previously when they took turns to visit each other, Jason always imported a tub of special homemade ice cream all the way from DC, almost always talking the air stewardess into keeping it in the airplane freezer so that it wouldn't melt. She was still condemning herself to the worst possible death when he came into the living room. He did not stop to say anything. Instead, he picked up his knapsack and flung it over his shoulder. Impulsively, she stopped him. "Jace, wait!" Jason paused at the doorway, angry and hurt. He wasn't afraid of showing it either. After all that he had been through, he felt that he had every right to. He asked her mockingly. "I suppose you want back your keys?" Blinking in surprise, she unconsciously muttered. "What?" He dug in his pocket, removed her keys and put it on the table next to her door. "There." She was now flabbergastered. "Jace, I don't want back my keys. I was just going to... apologize." "For what?" "For what I said." He wondered why she refused to look at him. It wasn't new to him. She had been avoiding his eyes for weeks now. "Well honestly, I'd rather you say something to hurt me than nothing at all." She caught a quick breath and looked at him. "What do you mean?" "I can't remember the last time I talked to you Joyce. Can you?" "I've been busy." She lied. "Never like this." She looked away again, preoccupied. Frustrated, he demanded for attention. "Joyce, look at me." But she couldn't. He frowned, realizing that all his instincts were right when he felt that something was wrong a few weeks ago. His eyebrows drew together as he guessed maybe it had something to do with her new boyfriend. "Is it Jonathon? You love him and you don't want me around to blow it?" She frowned, wishing she could say it was. It would be so much easier to lead him on this path. Then again, she would then be no different than Vincent Alexander and Agent Dana Scully to him. Maybe she could change the subject, she decided. "Why did you cut your trip short?" His eyes narrowed. "Is that why you're actually at home? Because I was away?" She started and protested feebly. "No! What are you talking about?" He seemed to be considering if he should pursue the issue but changed his mind. Instead, he asked her. "I asked you about Jonathan and you changed the subject, why?" "So did you. I asked you about your trip." She challenged back. He sighed. "Linda wanted to know about my father." She stiffened. "And?" "And she told me to tell her the next time I visited her." She frowned, not understanding his reply but he said. "Your turn to answer." She pretended not to hear him. "You should have just told her straightaway." "That wasn't an answer to my question." "Why can't you tell her?" She persisted to infuriate him. "I don't understand. Why am I the one you run to with your life's worries, Jace? You're supposed to be in love with her! She's deserves it, I don't." "You make it sound as if it's a life sentence." "It has been." She automatically muttered. And he immediately took offence. "You've put me through some harrowing secrets as well, you know!" "Yes and perhaps now I'm ready to share them with someone else!" His heart immediately constricted. Barely a whisper, his voice asked. "With Jonathon?" She resisted a flinch. "Yes." "You love him?" "I'm getting there." She continued to lie. He was quiet for a while and she willed herself not to think that she had ultimately done what she hadn't wanted to. She had led him to believe in a lie, that the past few weeks had been about Jonathon. Not wanting to dwell on the fact, she promptly asked him. "Don't you love Linda?" "Yes but.... " He trailed off, losing control. "But I'm still your keeper." She continued for him. He could not speak but nodded. The guilt twisted within her soul, knowing how difficult this was for him, just as it was for her. All this while they had relied on each other to survive, shutting out anyone else who tried to get close. Perhaps it was why their love lives always ended up in standstill. For the first time that night, she faced him eye to eye. "You're mine too but this can't go on, Jace. Not if we want our relationships to work. You have to tell her just like I have to let Jonathan into my life. We have to move on from each other." "I know." He whispered softly. And after a moment, he sighed. "You could have just told me, you know." He meant her avoiding him. She tried hard to maintain her composure, thinking of a few more important things that she should have told him but didn't. "I wanted to but...." Then she added softly. "Sometimes I wish I didn't love you so much." His brow creased but he said nothing. XXXXXXXXXXX It had been a hellish three weeks. And it was about to get worse. Tomorrow, she would be pulling a daring stunt that may either make or break her fragile non-existent career. And based on the judge's reputation, she had a feeling it would be the latter. After trudging down the streets of Chicago alone for two hours, Joyce found she had made her way to Jason's front door. 'Why am I even here?' She wondered. After their blow out, she was saved from the guilt of facing him. And now she willingly wanted to see him? Shaking her head, she still knocked tentatively on his door. A minute later, he opened it. He looked weary, as if he hadn't slept for days. Peering thought his half shut eyelids, he asked her. "What are you doing here? It's..." He glanced at his watch. "It's nearly one in the morning." Ignoring his question, she gave him a look. "Can I come in?" "Not a good time." He muttered. "I have an early shift tomorrow." She didn't say anything but her eyes were doleful enough to kill his attitude. He could tell something was wrong. Sighing, he let her in. When she walked in, she stared at his couch impassively. Jason leaned against the wall, his arms folded and waited for her to speak her mind. "Were you sleeping?" She finally asked. He rolled his eyes. "What do you want, Joyce?" She shrugged and looked down. And suddenly he knew. All the signs were there. Joyce Callahan was about to take on the world. But as always, the night before she did, she was having second thoughts. He ran a frustrated hand through his hair and challenged her with her very own idea of how their relationship should be. "Why are you here? You should be with Jonathon." He had guessed, she realized but was not surprised. Then, she lied. "He's not around." "Oh." Closing his eyes, he suppressed a moan. 'So that's why she's here. Boyfriend's not in town.' And to think he actually indulged in the thought that she couldn't live without him. Abandoning his wishful thinking, he figured he might as well get this over and done with. "Well?" "I don't really want to talk about it." She softly muttered, tracing a faint line onto his carpeted floor. Jason groaned loudly. After two shifts back to back, he was in no mood to cajole the problem out of her. "Whatever! I don't know about you but I need sleep. Lock the door behind you." He told her brusquely and walked back to his room. Suddenly alone, Joyce stood in the living room and stared at the wall. A few minutes later, she followed in his footsteps. He felt the covers move. He blinked and felt her slip underneath it beside him. "Joyce, what do you think you're doing?" "Oh shut up and go to sleep." Her voice was low and warning. He frowned and just could not imagine what was on her mind. As she settled against him, he waited for her to say something but she didn't. He gave up, too weary to be curious. So he pulled the covers around them and closed his eyes to sleep. Joyce's last waking thought was that she felt safe in his arms but some time in the night, she was proven wrong. A hard jab painfully woke her as she wincingly struggled to get up. Clutching her jaw where the blow still stung, she stared at Jason in utter amazement. "Jace!" His eyes suddenly snapped open. And slowly they turned to look at her. Frowning she reached for the light and switched it on. It was then that she noticed that he was sweating profusely and his face was deathly white. "Jace? Are you all right?" Within a few seconds, a gradual change overtook his shaken face. "Yes." He took long deep breaths and soon was breathing regularly again. "I'm fine." She wasn't convinced. "What was it?" He shook his head. "It was nothing." "A vision?" "A dream." He muttered. She frowned. "How can you tell the difference?" Lifting his head, he gave her a look. "There's a difference." Then he squinted his eyes, touching a slight reddish mark on her lower left cheek. "Did I do that?" Taking his hand gently from her face, she brushed it off. "It's nothing." His brows furrowed. "I'm sorry. I...." Trailing off, he seemed to remember their recent argument. But Joyce was too worried to care about that now. His face was enough to tell her that whatever he dreamt had upset him to the core. "Tell me." He studied her face for a while as if deciding if he should. Then he conceded, looking away. "It's the same dream. A man strapped to a chair. There were needles and drills." His face contorted as his mind flashed the images in his mind. "I felt his pain. I felt the drill break his skin. I even felt the blood gushing out." Closing his eyes, he quickly suppressed the thoughts. Joyce stopped breathing. First visions and now nightmares? Is that why he looked so tired? Because he wasn't sleeping well lately? "How long?" She asked him. He hesitated. "I don't know. A couple of weeks maybe." She flinched. About the time when she began avoiding him. "Does Linda know?" There was a longer silence. "I broke off with her." "When?" He shook her head slight. "It doesn't matter." Taking a deep breath, she obeyed his silent request and switched topics. "Do you recognize the man?" Shaking his head, he added softly. "He just kept calling her name." Joyce's heart constricted as instinct told her the answer before she could ask. "Whose name?" "Scully." Her gut feeling was right but she wasn't trilled at all. The thing that didn't click was the fact that Jason did not recognize the man. Who was he then? As she drifted into her thoughts, Jason was beginning to recover from his dream. The images were fading fast while he listened to her breathing. Then, he thought about her coming and decided to ask. "Do you want to talk about it?" She blinked and then realized he was talking about her presence here. It was then that it suddenly struck her. They were back to square one; she had sought him out for comfort and he had used her as a sounding board. They were both once again, back to where they had started! The awareness irritated her and she impulsively tried to reconstruct the barrier. "No. Not to you." He stiffened immediately and without warning moved himself to the edge of the bed, as far away from her as possible. Her sense of guilt immediately stung and she began to apologize. "Jace..." He interrupted, accusing her sharply. "Don't say you're sorry. You're not. You meant to say that." He was right so she didn't. Sinking back into the covers, Joyce closed her eyes and tears seeped out of them unconsciously. Jason also shut his eyes and cursed himself for ever being born. They both listened to the silence of the night, in too much pain to sleep. XXXXXXXXXX Jason never thought he would see her again so soon, the next day in fact. 'This time she had gone and done it!' He thought as he rolled his eyes to himself. Her colleagues had called him at the hospital to come and try to talk to her. And like a fool, he had slipped out during his lunch break, obediently complying. He shouldn't be here, he thought, Jonathon should. 'It's probably what she'd want anyway.' So irritated and practically glowering, he walked into the courtroom detainment center with his temper hanging barely on a thread. When he was allowed into her immaculate white cubicle, she looked up and was clearly surprised to see him. He remarked sarcastically. "Don't want to talk about it, huh?" She gave him a glare and turned away. "Still don't." "Too bad." He noted the bruise above her jaw, which he caused and had to concentrate not to let it bother him. "What you are doing here?" She growled, making mental a note to kill her colleagues. It had to be them who called him. "What are **you** doing in here?" He demanded to know instead. She shrugged nonchalantly. "A trivial matter. I insulted a judge." Smirking, he drawled mockingly. "I don't need four years of law school to know that was a stupid thing to do." She glared at him. "You're supposed to be on my side." "Not really. Actually, Mack called me to talk you into apologizing." "Over my dead body!" She snapped. "Okay then." He shrugged. "Maybe Jonathan could do a better job. I'll tell them to call him instead." She started and stood up instantly. "Don't!" Giving her a mock innocent look, he questioned her. "Don't what? Do you mean to say that he doesn't know you're in here? He's just a phone call away. Didn't you get to make your one phone call?" Squirming, partially with intense rage and mortifying embarrassment, she glared daggers at him. Then she gave up. She couldn't lie to him. He probably knew anyway, judging from his smug face. "I didn't call him because he wouldn't understand. Why I'm taking this stand." He restrained a smile. So his gut feeling was right, Jonathan was in town after all. She just didn't want to confide in him. "I don't either." She closed her eyes and sighed. "But you'd still love me for it." He held his breath. "And you're so sure that he won't?" "The problem is I'm not sure where he's concerned but I'm sure of you." He let go the breath he was keeping and a trace of a smile. It annoyed her. "It's what you wanted to hear, isn't it Jace? Fine, I'll say it clearer. You're my keeper too." His smile widened and he looked so full of himself that she wished she could slug him. However, she never thought he would be so low as to provoke her further but he did. "And yet you don't allow me to have you as mine." That did it for her short fuse and she retorted ruthlessly. "I wish you weren't, believe me! I wish I didn't have the choice." If her words hurt, he didn't show it. Instead, he nodded as if he understood. "Fine. I'll take the choice away from you." He said and walked off. Later, she found out that he called Jonathon. He had made good his threat; he didn't give her the choice. XXXXXXXXXX The nurse looked at Jason and shook her head slightly. It wasn't a strange for interns to be looking like walking zombies but this intern seemed to be the worst of the lot. She raised an eyebrow when he leaned against the counter and pinched the bridge of his nose, pausing from reading the file in his hand. "You okay, Doctor?" "Yeah." He replied gruffly and returned to his document. "You should go home to sleep at the end of your shift. The mistake is you stay here and they wake you up for every little thing." She advised. He shrugged and muttered. "Doesn't matter. Don't really like sleeping anyway." Frowning, she wondered what he meant by that. But the doctor was too engrossed by what he was reading so she did not ask. Instead she went back to her database entry and repeated the numbers under her breath so that she didn't get them wrong. Jason cocked his head slight when he heard her. "What's that you just said? Was it a Social Security number?" "Yeah. I was filling it in for the registry." He froze and a sense of dread filled him. "Is the patient's name Joyce Callahan?" The nurse looked surprised that he had guessed right and nodded her head dumbly. He instantly leaned forward and pushed the monitor to face him. "Gunshot wound?" His voice croaked. "Yeah, from what I hear, there was a shoot out in the court-house. She was caught in the crossfire by accident." He was barely breathing now. "Which room?" "She's in the ICU. Third floor, room 572." Without hesitation, he ran towards the stairs. When he reached the ICU ward, he almost dashed into Dr. Collin Fenton. "Whoa there! Dr. Alexander? What's your hurry?" The latter chuckled. "Joyce Callahan." Jason managed to say in between his shorts gasps of air. "How is she? Is she all right?" His panicked face told Fenton that Alexander knew his patient personally. "Yes, Alexander. She's fine." He held his shoulder to calm him down. "She was very lucky, it was just a bullet graze. She had quite a shock so we put her in the ICU just to monitor her condition for the night, that's all." Jason's shoulders dropped in relief. "Can I see her charts?" Fenton smiled. 'Spoken like a true doctor.' He thought and nodded. "Of course. I'll get them for you." Jason nodded. "Thanks. Can I see her?" "Yes you can but...." He nodded towards the room nearby. "Her boyfriend just arrived so.... maybe you could give them a while first." Stiffening, the young intern took a couple of steps and looked through the glass at Jonathon sitting next to Joyce's bed. Then, he stepped back and looked down, studying the ground with peculiar interest. Fenton frowned, not understanding his strange reaction. "Alexander?" He looked up. "Are you all right?" "Yeah." He nodded and smirked. "You're right. I'll give them their privacy. Maybe I'll drop by some other time." "Sure." Fenton replied and his eyes narrowed. "Maybe when I check on her later, I'll mention that you dropped by?" "Yeah, fine." He hastily thanked him and followed him to the nurses' station for her chart. 'She was fine.' He told himself again when he finished reading her chart. After staying away from her for two weeks, he'd never thought he would see her as a patient in his hospital; especially not for a gunshot wound! Seeing Jonathon at her side a few minutes ago had reminded him of their decision to stay apart. Although he had officially broken up with Linda, Joyce had made it clear that she wanted her relationship with Jonathon to work out. So however badly he wanted to see her, he wouldn't. After all, it was just a bullet graze, nothing really serious. Jonathan would be sufficient to comfort her and get her through this. And Fenton would tell her that I dropped by. She would understand, he thought. Although his resolve set, he still found himself wanting to see her. So he did, at discreet moments of course. She would always be asleep, oblivious of his presence. And he would always just watch, sitting at the far edge of her room so that he would not be tempted to touch her. She slept like a child and he wished he could imitate her. These days sleeping just took too much from him. His unconscious visions were getting more vivid and frequent. Thus he waited until he was ready to drop in exhaustion before he attempted it. That way his mind would be too tired to even contemplate dreaming. He also made it a point to sleep in the hospital staff mess. That way before he could rest enough to begin dreaming, someone would wake him up for an emergency. It worked out to be a good scheme for him but the rest of the interns seemed to be disconcerted by his over- dedication. He tried to placate them but to no avail so he resorted to lying, telling them that his termite-infested apartment was under a series of fumigation sessions. There had to be a reason why he kept having the same nightmares but he just couldn't figure out what. H wondered if he should talk to someone about it. However, he couldn't afford a shrink at the moment and talking to the hospital physiologist certainly would do nothing to promote himself in the establishment so he gave up the idea. Two days after Joyce was admitted, he walked into her room to see her. It was nearly midnight and he expected her to be already asleep. To his shock, he found her bed empty. His first thoughts were for the worse but soon his brain began functioning and he knew that she had probably been checked out. A bullet gaze usually didn't take long to heal. But the deafening heartbeat in his ears caused by his prior fears clouded his noble thoughts of staying away for her sake. Finally, his selfish needs took over. He had to see her. XXXXXXXXXX After several torturous weeks, she had decided that enough was enough. 'Give up and face up to the facts, Joyce.' She had told herself and subsequently picked up her courage, ending her relationship with Jonathon. He was stunned, hurt and confused. He couldn't understand why. He thought everything was going great. He was in love and he thought she was too. He thought that she was the one. He was even beginning to think long term, living together for a while and then maybe an engagement ring. Boy, was he wrong! The woman that he was in love with was lost. Everything changed when her supposedly platonic best friend walked out of her life without a backward glance. The funniest thing was, she had asked for it but she just couldn't deal with it. As hard she tried to fight it, he remained to be the man in her life. Maybe it was because her world had revolved around him for far too long that she just couldn't remove him from that pedestal. It wasn't even that high a pedestal. Jason had his faults, even more than the average man. And he knew how to drive her nuts. Just like what he was doing right now, keeping away from her, making her feel his absence. But Jonathon was a sweet man and he thoroughly cared for her. Under Jason's instructions, her colleagues had informed her ex-boyfriend first when it happened. They didn't know that it was already over between them. So he came and took care of her while she was admitted. He even picked her up and sent her home when the doctor told her that it was okay to go home. Joyce sighed and stared out her tiny kitchen window. The water in the kettle rattled a little as it began to boil. She listened to its sound and for a moment let it distract her from her jangled emotions. Then suddenly another sound awoke her peaceful trance. It was the door. She frowned and wondered who would be calling at such a late hour. Immediately her rationale suggested the only person that knew her well enough to believe it appropriate but she pushed the thought aside. If he wouldn't even see her in the hospital, what made her think that he'd call on her now? Walking to the door, she peeked through the peephole to see who it was. Her pulse raced when she did and she opened the door to let him in. Jason looked at her expressively. For a moment, they faced each other without a word. She finally broke the awkward moment. "I'm making tea. Would you like one?" Nodding his head, he walked in and began removing his coat. It was then that she noticed that he was half wet. "You're wet." "It rained." He finally spoke. "A little." She nodded and walked slowly to the kitchen. Half a minute later he entered and stood by the doorway. She turned off the whistling kettle. Pouring the hot water in two mugs with teabags, she began to add the sugar. "Joyce." She heard her call behind her and lifted her head slightly. "I take three..." She interrupted him, slightly annoyed. "I know. I didn't forget." He paused for a while. "I was going to say I take three teaspoons of sugar, not salt." Her head looked down directly, reading the label on the jar. He was right. It wasn't sugar. She closed eyes tightly as frustration mounted. Her hands suddenly began to shake and she put down the spoon and held the counter firmly to stop them. He approached her slowly from behind, standing barely an inch away; so close that her skin prickled sensing his body heat. She heard him sigh and his mouth leaned near her ear. "I miss you too." The words broke her control. It was just like him to know exactly what the problem was. She let her tears fall. "Why don't you want me, Joyce? I want you." She forced herself to tell him what hurt most. "Do you? You could've fooled me. I never saw your face all the time I was admitted." He winced. "I did go to see you." "Yeah, always while I'm asleep. Was there a particular reason? Or do you get a kick out of scaring the nurses whenever they check on me and see a dark figure sitting in the chair nearby?" She lowered her voice. "Did you ever think that maybe I wanted to see your face?" Clenching his fists tightly, he reminded her. "You had Jonathon. It's what you wanted." She shook her head. "You claim you want me. But you never wanted me, Jace. You weren't given the choice, just like me." "I'd like to think that subconsciously I did want you." "Jace, you're so full of shit! Admit it. You wanted Linda to be the one." He sighed. "She wasn't." "But..." "She wasn't." He interrupted her firmly with the same answer. And by then, he lost his willpower and reached for her. She stiffened but only for a moment. The feel of his arms felt so right that all doubts vanished for her. Perhaps he was right, maybe unconsciously she wanted him too. While she leaned back onto his large frame, she noticed that his clothes were damping hers. "You're making me wet." He raised an eyebrow. "I am?" Recognizing the mock innocence in his voice, she rolled her eyes and released herself from his arms. "You started this, you know." He was perplexed, innuendo forgotten. "What?" "You caused everything that's happened so far." If he didn't, she would have never known about his parents and they would have never dealt with their inseparable issue at all. For his sake, she explained aloud. "When you first arrived in Chicago, you were acting like a jerk." Looking thoughtful, his face soon cleared as he remembered his reasons. "I was trying to prove a point but it backfired." "What point?" His gaze dimmed. "That you would never leave me, no matter what." "It was a test? You put me to a test?" "I didn't know I was doing it until it was too late." She was still incredulous. "You pushed my buttons and you thought that I'd take it like some pin cushion?" "Yes, I did." He flung his hands up in the air. "But I was fucked up, okay? You were right about Linda and I wanted to tell her. But then Agent Scully suddenly left me in the gutter and everything just...." Sighing, his words softened. "I just figured that the problem was with me. Only you seemed to be the only person that disproves that theory. So I began driving you crazy. Maybe if I tried hard enough, you would leave too. Then I'll be sure that it's really.... me." She stared at him, her entire body stilled. He blamed himself for his father's disappearance and Agent Scully's distance! She was beginning to understand now. Her mind recalled his haunted looks in the past when he railed and provoked her. She knew he never enjoyed the taunts and she didn't comprehend why he persisted until now. Her heart breaking for him, she stepped closer. "I wish I could turn back time so I could prove you wrong." Smiling, he gently teased her. "Only because you now realize the choice wasn't yours." Shaking her head, she reminded him of his own words. "I'd like to think that unconsciously I wanted you too." His smile widened and then vanished. Leaning closer, he kissed her forehead and lingered at the strands of her hair. She took a deep breath of his masculine scent and realized how much she loved it. But she never told him before so she did for the first time. Slightly surprised, he felt a small tug below his stomach. And his senses were immediately heightened. For as long as he can remember, he had always been the one making suggestive remarks and she always brushed them away. And yet he had just heard her tell him how much she loved his scent? It was almost too much for him to bear. Shaking his head, he calmed himself down. Perhaps she meant it innocently, he thought. Then, his eyes snapped open in astonishment when he felt her hands on his chest. She was unbuttoning his shirt. His breath faltered, as he demanded to know. "What are you doing?" She raised her eyebrow at the gruffness of his voice. "You'll get a chill if you don't get out of these clothes." He let out a breath. "Oh." She wondered about his odd reaction then felt his heart thudding wildly through his shirt. Looking up into his dark eyes, she saw what the problem was. 'Oh my God, the man thought I was coming on to him!' She thought. But she quickly looked down so that he wouldn't know she knew. Before long, she felt a slight burning sensation that trilled her subliminally. She recognized it as the same awareness that gripped her each time she knew she was fully in control of a case. The same applied here; she had just realized the power she held over this man and it wasn't just an innocent platonic kind. She found that her hands had automatically finished what she had begun a few minutes ago. And his bare chest seemed to mesmerize her as one hand pushed the soft white material off his shoulders and the other trailed down his skin determinately. He sucked in a short breath and stared at her. She sensed he was giving her an odd look but did not want to look up, lest it would break the delicious spell she was under. When she reached the waist of his pants, she unbuckled his belt slowly and his already freed shirt enabled the other hand to assist removing it. He managed to find his voice when she unzipped his slacks, pausing halfway on purpose. "Joyce....." "Hmm?" "I..." He caught her hand, not realizing that it was in a terribly awkward location of his tense body. "I can undress myself." "Okay." She smiled innocently. He stared into her eyes and his confusion grew. 'Was she coming on to him?' But it was just Joyce, it just wasn't possible! Then his eyes widened in shock when she gently moved her hand, accidentally brushing against him. "Are you done with my hand? Or have you changed your mind and need my... expertise?" He looked down to where their hands were and swallowed hard. Abruptly, he let her go and stepped back. She watched his face for a while. Then unable to bear the uncertainly in his eyes, she stepped up to close the distance. 'Enough!' She thought decisively. There were more than enough doubts and unknowns in his life. She will not create another. Pulling his face down gently, she kissed him. She wanted him and she wanted him to know it once and for all. His body responded hard and fast to the feel of her lips against him. And his hands slipped around her back as he tried to fit her body to the length of his. Joyce's hand felt the warm skin of his chest and brushed across his nipples, causing him to make an unintelligible sound in her mouth. But the slow and sensual kiss suddenly came to an abrupt halt. She was absolutely incredulous when he pushed her away gently and muttered hastily. "I should go." "What?" He looked frantic as he gathered his shirt and began to make towards the exit. His loose pants restricted his movements and he cursed under his breath. Joyce grabbed his arm from behind. "Wait a minute, what just...." She stopped as realization dawned her. "You had a vision, didn't you?" He froze, acknowledging that she was right. "What did you see?" "It's late, I should go." He whispered instead. "What did you see?" She insisted to know. His voice was so low she could barely make it out. "You. Me. Making love." She let out a sigh of relief. Then, she frowned. They were kissing and yet it never crossed his mind that they were go that far? She shook her head, amazed at his child-like simplicity. Taking his hand, her eyes told him again exactly what she thought of his vision. Jason shook his head at her. "No, we can't." He backed away and tried shaking her hand off but she wouldn't let go. "Joyce, this thing between us is not about sex. It's more than that." "You saw it in your vision. It's going to happen anyway." "I also saw my dad and Agent Scully. My visions could be wrong." She ignored him. "What are you afraid of?" "It's just wrong." He vehemently told her. "Is it?" She tiptoed and kissed him. "Then why does it feel so right?" Whispering, she kissed him again. He closed his eyes and his mouth twitched to respond. 'She's right. It feels so right.' He thought and when she slipped her tongue in and licked his, he gave up the fight. From her mouth, his lips trailed down her neck. His fingers lifted her shirt and explored her soft skin. Then in one fluid motion, she helped him remove her top. He wasn't surprised she wasn't wearing a bra. She usually didn't when she was ready for bed. His gaze raked every inch of her as her arms moved to cover her breasts. He shook his head and restrained her. Then gently fingering the little square bandage patch on her side where the bullet grazed her, he told her. "I wanted to see you." She saw that he blamed himself for staying away and took his face to hers. "I know." She kissed the hurt away. "I kno...." He silenced her, telling her in action how much he wanted to be at her side. When he had redeemed himself in that aspect, he thought of another. "Your father will kill me." He suddenly stated in between. She almost burst out laughing and teased. "Are you planning to tell him?" He didn't answer but concentrated on her. And as he probed and pleasured, he heard her tell him to touch her in the places that ached for him. Drawing his head for a quick breath of air, he acknowledged her request. "Okay." She frowned, feeling dizzy and fuzzy at the same time. "Okay what?" She muttered. Surely he didn't mean telling her father? He asked a second later. "Didn't you say something?" "No." She answered and gasped in delight when he touched her where she was hoping he would. "Oh. Never mind then." He whispered, relishing her ecstatic face and fully intending to cause more of them. Not in the kitchen though. Scooping her up, he carried her towards the bedroom. But when he stumbled on his half dangling pants for the second time, Joyce sighed. "For God's sakes, Jace. Loose the pants before we both break our necks!" XXXXXXXXXX End of Keeper Author: PhileyX E-Mail: phileyx@yahoo.com Web-site: http://www.angelfire.com/id/phileyx The end is near so feedback would help tremendously.