Title: A Father is Hard to Find (Part One of One) Author: PhileyX E-Mail: phileyx@yahoo.com Web-site: http://www.angelfire.com/id/phileyx Rating: PG Category: DSR (no D does not stand for Doggett), Will/Joyce UST. Spoilers: Requiem Prequels: Man Without A Face, The Matchbox, The Dinner Guest, A Nobody is Hard to Find, Time Out, Redhead Disclaimer: All the characters here do not belong to me. Excerpts from the song 'Acoustic #3' by The Goo Goo Dolls. No infringement of copyright intended. Author's note: The prequels to this story can be found at: http://www.angelfire.com/id/phileyx/Face.html http://www.angelfire.com/id/phileyx/Matchbox.html http://www.angelfire.com/id/phileyx/Dinner.html http://www.angelfire.com/id/phileyx/Nobody.html http://www.angelfire.com/id/phileyx/Timeout.html http://www.angelfire.com/id/phileyx/Redhead.html If the format is screwed up, try reading from my site: http://www.angelfire.com/id/phileyx/Father.html Intro: This story takes place after the Requiem. Two years after his disappearance, a man appears claiming to be Mulder, with a catch; he just didn't have his face. Scully finds out he really is her ex- partner the unconventional way. Now the consortium is after their only son and she is forced to make the ultimate sacrifice; she gives them both up. Although intent on keeping herself away from her son, she is unable to stop herself from seeing Mulder. And Will grows up without her. XXXXXXXXXXXX A Father Is Hard To Fi (Part One of One) "Would you like me to talk to him, Jason?" Miss Price gently asked the thoughtful young man in front of her. "What? Oh no." Flustered he took a minute to compose himself. "The thing is I appreciate what my father was trying to do. He wanted me to experience childhood and not become some freak rushing through. But whatever I do now is my decision, not his." "I understand that but this is not high school. You have an opportunity to skip a couple of semesters, not only saving time but money. The sponsors of your scholarship are definitely for it and if you don't comply, you might lose it. Please reconsider, Jason." He sighed. "I will. Thank you Miss Price. Will that be all?" "Yes." She watched him leave before shaking her head. He was the first medical student she knew that scored perfect A's for his first year. And yet, he was so reluctant to stand out from the rest of his peers. Jason walked thoughtfully out the Medical school office. It looked as if he didn't have a choice, he would have to take the express lane this time. "Hey you." He turned around and found Joyce sitting at a bench nearby. Smiling he headed over and joined her. "Not so close." She suddenly warned. "What?" "I'm stalking Nicholas Duval so I can't be seen intimate with you." He rolled his eyes and looked over at her victim across the lawn. 'Typical!' He thought. 'A football jock.' She caught the look of disgust on his face and told him to shut up. He protested. "I didn't even say anything." "But you were about to so I decided to save time." "If you really want a great guy, I have a friend...." "Oh no! The last time I went out with any of your friends, I spent the whole night playing Dungeon and Dragons at the Space Club." "I told you I was sorry already!" "Damn, he's looking over! Quick, pretend we're talking about a lecture!" she hastily opened her file and pushed it between them. "I have a better idea..." He trailed off, lifted her chin up with one hand and kissed her. "Mmmf..." She protested at his lips and managed to push him away. "You jerk! What the hell do you think you're doing?" "Trying to get his attention." He told her quietly and moved closer, his arm around her. "Get away from me, you pervert!" She slapped his hand away and her eyes widened when another dared to touch her breast. "Jace, this is getting really sick..." "Hey!" A low voice growled She turned and blinked. 'Nicholas Duval!' "Is he bothering you, baby?" Jason winced when he called her baby. To his surprise, she just smiled. "Erm... no." "No? Looked like he was to me." He took a step nearer them and glared at the Jason. Suddenly Jason wished he checked out his height before he tried this stunt. The man was at least two inches taller than him. Coughing slightly, he got up and faced him calmly. "I'm sorry, my mistake. I didn't know that she was your girl." "She's...." Duval started to say something but caught Joyce's pleading look and melted. "Uh yeah." 'She's certainly joining the game with this damsel in distress act.' He thought. She must really like him. "Well, I best be off. Goodbye, my lady." Giving her a slight bow, he walked away. When he glanced back, Joyce was happily chatting away with Duval. 'Oh yeah, she owed him, big time.' XXXXXXXXXX "A jerk! A loser! A Neanderthal! And it's all your fault!" "My fault?" Jason gasped in amazement. "Why is it my fault?" "If it weren't for you, I wouldn't have dated him in the first place." She told him and slumped down next to him. He sighed and pulled her into his arms. "The only reason why I introduced him to you was because you begged me to so don't lay this on me, okay?" She sighed. "I know. I'm just pissed and you know when I am..." "You blame me. Yes, I know." "Why am I attracted to losers?" "You're not the only one. We're both attracted to losers." He told her comfortingly. "Actually you're attracted to bimbos from La La land." She snorted and added. "With the minimum bust size criteria, of course." "That's what I keep telling my friends. You just don't make the cut but they don't listen." Jason whined, amazed that he still had to explain their platonic relationship even after two years in college. "Craig asked about you, wondering if I'm done with you so that he could get a turn." "Tell him to go jump in a lake!" "You're not turning into a bitter woman, are you? Because Sid's not worth it." "I don't want to talk about it." "Great!" He grinned and stood up. "Ice cream?" "Yeah. You're a life saver!" Joyce gushed and lay down on his bed, looking at Miss April that was stuck on his ceiling. "Hey did you notice that April's right breast's bigger that the other?" "No way!" "Just slightly." "Really?" Jason walked over and placed the carton on the table next to the bed. Then he lay down next to her and studied the picture. "Hey, you might be right!" "Silicon, that's all it is." "Yeah but it's still worth it." She rolled her eyes. "Chocolate?" "Of course." He reached out for the ice cream and passed it over. She pulled herself up and leaned against the wall. "So how's fourth year medical coming along?" "Fine. They're pushing me to skip it too." "What? What the hell is their rush?" "I don't know. It's a game of politics and money and I'm getting seriously sick of it." "You could have flopped a few tests just to worry them, you know." "I can't. If I do, I'm off the list too." He sighed. "Your dad was right to let you go through school normally. Skipping semesters doesn't seem to trill you at all." "Not when the whole school and your sponsors are watching you like a hawk. I feel like a freak." "You are but I love you anyway." She told him. He smiled. "You're just saying that because I'm your ice cream supplier." "Well I supplied you cookies for years. It's about time you paid back." "How is your dad anyway?" He asked gently. Her voice softened. "Worried. But just as long as I don't fail anything, I should have enough to tide me over until I'm a full fledged lawyer." "You'll be fine, don't worry." "I know. He still can't get over it though. All his life savings gone because of one false move." Her eyes watered. "We loved that house." "I know. Dad was sorry to see your parents move." "Yeah, I know." XXXXXXXXXX His face told her something was wrong. She immediately asked Minnie to cover for her at the front desk and went to him. "Sorry." He whispered softly. "It's okay. Despite what you think, the library will survive without me for a few minutes." She joked but he didn't smile. He held out a folded letter. She took it and read, her eyes widening at each paragraph. "What's going on?" "I don't know. I tried calling my dad but the number was changed." "They can't just kick you out of the dorm, Jace. Isn't there someone you can see?" "They can if I haven't paid last semester's living." He shook his head worriedly. "The dorm isn't what's worrying me Joyce, it's dad. I haven't heard from him in two months. No phone calls, no e-mails, nothing." She frowned. It wasn't like Vincent Alexander to disappear into thin air at all. "Maybe you should take a trip back home?" "Yeah I figured that out too. I just need a place to dump my stuff. Would you mind?" "I'll have to ask Amy but it shouldn't be a problem. Will you be missing any important classes?" "Nothing I can't catch up on." "Of course." She gave him a smirk and for once, he smiled. After he left her, he went back to the dorm to pack. Something was wrong, he could feel it in his bones but could not understand it. He was used to his father's flighty schedule, a part and parcel of being a freelance writer. The biggest problem was he never knew where to reach him when he was away. The journey back home was long and tiring. By the time he walked off the bus, he felt like a dead log. Deciding he rather walk the few blocks than to wait forever for the public bus, he trudged wearily down the road. Each street and corner brought back memories and he wished Joyce were around to share this moment with him. Then again, it would only depress her further. She wished she could have gone home to say goodbye to the house before her parents moved out but Jack Callahan was too much in trouble to delay the inevitable and made the move while she was in the midst of her exams. As he turned and walked down his street, his tiredness began to disappear. His house came into sight. It hadn't changed much, maybe just the green coat on the gate. He stepped up the gravel walk and took out his key. Inserting it into the lock, he jiggled it impatiently. Surprisingly, it wouldn't turn. 'Maybe dad changed the locks.' He thought and rang the doorbell instead. A few minutes later, the door opened but the man that greeted him wasn't his father. "Yes?" Jason blinked. Looking about him just to make sure he got the right house, he hesitantly asked. "I'm sorry but I'm looking for Vincent Alexander?" "I don't know any Vincent Alexander. Sorry, I think you got the wrong house." And he was about to close the door when Jason stopped him. "No you don't understand. He's my father and we live here." The man frowned. "Well, I moved in two months ago. I don't know who lived here before me. Maybe you could check with the realtor, JP Hides?" "You moved in two months ago?" "That's right." Jason's mind raced. 'That would be almost immediately after the Callahans moved.' The man looked kindly at his troubled face. "Would you like the address of the realtor?" Jason started. "Yes thank you." And he disappeared to get it, passing it to him after he returned. "Good luck!" "Thanks." Jason wished back, confused and suddenly feeling very very afraid. XXXXXXXXXX "He can't stay here forever!" Amy protested. "I know." Joyce sighed. "It's just temporary." "It's been three months, Joyce. Sorry but I don't understand what the problem is, why can't he find his own place?" "He is... erm... looking for one." She lied; not wanting to tell her the real reason Jason was bunking with them. "It's just hard to find a good room, that's all." Amy eyed her suspiciously. "Is he in some kind of trouble?" "What?" "I mean, is there someone after him or something?" "God! You certainly have an imagination!" Joyce declared. Her roommate smirked. "Well, I just can't figure him out and you're supposed to be attached. Letting him sleep with you and all can't be good for Danny's ego." "Danny doesn't know and I hope I can keep it that way until we get it sorted out." Joyce sighed. "Well you better work on it fast. There're a lot of rumours going around about you two." "After all these years, you'd think they've given up on pairing us together." "Not when he's seen sneaking into your room every night and leaving only in the morning." "At least he doesn't snore." Amy rolled her eyes. "If he did, I wouldn't even give him a day's grace." "Thanks Amy and I'm really sorry." "Figure it out soon Joyce. It's all I ask." "Right." She mumbled more to herself as her roommate walked off. Reality was that they were both broke and Vince Alexander was missing. Jason had spent two weeks trying to track him down before returning to his studies. For his absence, he got a serious reprimand and another threat to the only funding left for him. It was more than enough to keep him under intense pressure; she didn't want to add another to the list. "Hey." Jason opened the door and greeted her tiredly. Sinking onto her bed gratefully, he moaned. "Ah, a bed." She smiled grimly. Since he took on a part time job to pay for his food and other expenses, she hardly saw him on his feet. She doubted he even dated anymore. "Aren't you going to have a bath first?" "No." "Jace!" She warned. He sighed and reluctantly pulled himself up. "I don't smell that bad." "But I'm still sleeping next to you." "Oh all right." He moaned and got up. She watched him go and wondered how long they could hold up. Not for long definitely. Even if Amy didn't give the word, sooner or later someone else would report him. Nobody liked a freeloader, especially a med student. And then there was Danny. Six feet two inches of pure hunk material poured into one gorgeous mold of a man. He was also funny, intelligent and looked at her like she was the only girl left on earth. And she was falling in love with him. She wished to God she could be honest with him regarding the current sleeping arrangements. But it was difficult enough convincing him there was nothing going on between Jason and her at the beginning of their relationship so she naturally omitted the fact. Not for long though, rumours spread pretty thick around campus. Amy was right; she had to do something about Jace and fast. XXXXXXXXXX "Joyce, calm down!" Amy breathlessly said while trying to keep up with her down the hallway. "Calm down?" Her roommate hissed dangerously and abruptly turned to glower at her. "Calm down? How the hell do you expect me to calm down after finding out that the whole college thinks I'm some kind of slut?" "For God's sakes, it's rumours. They tend to be far-fetched...." Joyce snapped back impatiently. "Do you know how many guys propositioned me within the last few weeks? I didn't catch on why until today when I was unceremoniously dumped in the middle of a football field. Danny was very explicit with the details of my reputation! Why didn't you tell me?" Amy sighed. "I did." Her friend's glare grew intense and she found herself admitting sheepishly. "Well, maybe I could have elaborated a little on how bad it was." "Damn it, Amy!" The former almost shouted and began to walk towards their room again. "I could have done something!" "Oh, like what? Like kick Jace out?" "That would be a good start, wouldn't it?" Joyce furiously unlocked the door and pushed it open with all her might, slamming it against the wall. "You don't mean that." Amy calmly walked in and closed the door behind her. "Actually I do. You know why? Because I care for Danny, Amy. I actually care for that conclusion-jumping moron. The last thing I wanted to do was hurt him." Amy shook her head and reminded her. "And you care for Jason too." Shaking her head, Joyce grimly retorted. "I think I've done enough caring for him. God, it's like high school all over again!" "Joyce..." Amy began but was interrupted. "All that man does is ruin my life! Since high school, he has intimidated every one of my dates even though I was prepared to swear on the Bible that we're just friends. And I'm sick of it, Amy!" She picked up one of Jason's shirt from her bed and threw it across the room angrily. "And you know what? I don't think I'm gonna put it him anymore. I've had enough of Jason Alexander and I hope I never set eyes on him again. I deserve more than this. I deserve a life!" "Let's not be too hasty, okay?" Amy soothed her nervously. "Perhaps we should just settle on finding him a new place to live." Before Joyce could say anything, there was a slight knock on the door and the devil himself appeared at the doorway. "What's going on? I can hear the catfight from across the hallway." Amy grimaced, not really liking the fact that he was here before she could intercede on his behalf. She had seen Joyce in her moods before and she was not nice when she was in one, especially to Jason. Evidently, Joyce couldn't care less as she accused him coldly. "You are the problem, Jace." He recognized her temper immediately from experience and wondered what on earth had he done to set her off this bad. "What?" Amy quickly intervened. "Jace, this is really not a good time. Come back later." He stole a quick glance at her best friend's roommate and back to the piercing blue eyes glaring at him. "But she said...." Joyce control snapped and she almost yelled. "Do you know what they're saying about me, Jace?" 'The slut stories.' He thought, frowning. Hesitantly, he acknowledged the fact that he knew. "It's just stupid rumours." "It's not rumours, Jace." Her mounting anger suddenly made her voice dip into a hoarse whisper. "It's my reputation." "I know but...." "I've had enough." She cut him short. "I want you out of my life." The words hurt but he knew she had every right to say them. "Joyce, you're just pissed...." "No, I'm not **just pissed**!" She interrupted him again. "Actually it's more like I've achieved enlightenment. Why am I putting up with this? With you? With all this shit of being your fucking plaything without the strings attached to it, your free and easy lay?" He told her quietly, his patience slowly fading. "You're not." "It doesn't matter if I am or not. Everybody thinks I am and maybe that's why I get lots of creeps asking me out. And just once, someone decent comes along, he gets hurt because he thinks you're fucking me in...." "All right, that's enough!" Jason snapped. Taking a long step forward, he threw her a look of contempt. "I don't understand it, Joyce. Do I have a sign on my forehead that says 'Go ahead and punch me!'? I'm sick of being the target of all your frustrations. Every time you get pissed, you take it out on me. I'm not your fucking punching bag, Joyce!" "You're right, you're not." Her response came fast and merciless. "You're just my fucking problem!" Amy nearly gasped aloud and watched as Jason's face turned ashen. He recovered within a few seconds later, barely whispering. "I'm not staying here to take this from you." And he turned to walk off. "That's right Jace, go! It's exactly what I want you to do!" Joyce called after him. Amy couldn't contain it any longer and braved herself to interfere, reaching out to grab his arm. "Jason wait! She's just upset, she didn't mean it!" He looked at her, for a moment his blue eyes revealed the depth of the hurt and her heart painfully constricted at the sight. Jason was hardly breathing. He felt as if his whole world was crashing down, as if he fought his best and it was over. He was tired. It was time to give up. Looking over at Joyce, he struggled to say the words he wanted to say. "I didn't want this to happen either. I...." His breath faltered. Joyce stood there watching him mutter hesitantly. Her fury was slowly receding, the usual phenomenon after healthily venting out her rage. She was also slowly beginning to realize the enormity of her accusations towards him. And was becoming more and more horrified with her harsh, unfeeling words. Unconsciously, she walked towards him while he mumbled his feelings. "I never wanted your life to turn out this way, Joyce. I never intended.... " He trailed off again and then suddenly shook his head, as if realizing that it was no use. Fully ashamed of herself now, Joyce walked faster, managing to catch him just as he was about to leave. He resisted her touch but she persisted. "Don't!" He roughly told her off but she wrapped her arms around him tightly, refusing to budge. He growled her name, warning her to let him go. She ignored him and held on for dear life. Jason froze. For a moment, he stopped thinking and reveled in her, allowing the warmth and ferocity of her embrace to take away the pain, the doubts, the fear. And when his heart felt like it was about to burst for lack of air, his lungs remembered their function and began to breathe. Joyce felt his stiff large body start to relax and she whispered with all her might. "I'm sorry." He listened silently and wondered if he had the right to accept her apologies. After all, wasn't he the one that destroyed her life? "I didn't..." She trailed off and said again after a while. "I'm sorry." Despite the current hurt, his prior worries began to swirl around him, crowding his thoughts wildly. Then he targeted the very source of all their problems. "I can't find him, Joyce. Why?" Then he demanded again, more passionately. "Why did he just disappear on me? He's all I've got." She soothed him with soft hushes. "You got me too, Jace." His limp arms found life and moved around her. "I can't...take this. I don't understand..." His words alternated between soft snivels of contained tears. "It's okay. You're not alone. I'm here." "Joyce...." "I'm not going anywhere, Jace. I promise you that." With her words, his control shredded to pieces. His tears fell freely and she joined him. Meanwhile Amy shook herself awake, previously too mesmerized with the emotional drama in front of her. Softly so as not to disturb the couple's private moment, she tiptoed to the edge of the room, turned the doorknob with precious care and closed it as quietly as she could. Successfully accomplishing all three tasks, she let out a sigh of relief. Then taking a look at her watch, she suddenly wondered where the hell was she supposed to sleep. It was nearly midnight and she doubted her roommate and her best friend would be done making up for at least quite a while. 'Certainly not after that powerful performance!' She thought and groaned. XXXXXXXXXX Sometime later, nestled in his arms, Joyce wasn't sure who was comforting whom. Both on the floor, she rested her head against his chest while he leaned against her bed. Silent, they listened carefully to their breathing and waited for their thoughts to cease. It was probably the worst of their best fights. And the one that would have cost them their friendship if she hadn't realized how out of hand things were going. He was stumbling through a harrowing three months and she had insensitively attacked him beyond limits any man could endure. Involuntarily wincing, she wondered if she would ever forgive herself that. She had tried to put herself in his shoes several times since his father's disappearance. And every single time she admired his ability to still function. Then again, Jason had always reminded her of Captain America, Dilbert and Barney all rolled into one. He was her rock, her St. Peter in this nutty world. The more she saw of this world, the more disillusioned she came to be with it. She never imagined college kids could be so screwed up. Her faith, beliefs, and principles seemed to be challenged one by one and although it proved to be somewhat exciting, most of the time she wished she could go back home, safe from real life. Oddly enough, Jason was himself a weird twist in her life, being an atheist, a Treckie, a genius and currently the son of a missing man. But he ultimately provided a safety net for her falls. He kept reminding her that she was who she was and not what people perceived her to be. Her biggest personal trial was remaining true to her religion. It wasn't easy being Catholic in this day and age. From high school to college, it was one compromise after another. But incredible as it sounds, Jason was the reason why she kept going to church on Sundays. Although he sometimes laughed at her Vatican beliefs, he respected her faith. It somehow made her feel that she owed it to him to remain steadfast in it. Then there was his incredible logic. Behind that Aliens-Are-Out-There exterior, he had the ability to dissect a situation, list the facts and make sound judgment to deal with it. Perhaps it was the additional Physiology classes he attended on Tuesdays after high school or the Sociology ones on Thursday, but he had the knack of sizing up a circumstance or a person within a couple of minutes. It came to a point, he could always tell by which date her romance between her many boyfriends would turn sour. She tried to prove him wrong of course, but to no avail. Even for Danny, he had predicted it wouldn't last more than five months. She rolled her eyes, he was right. Her thoughts broke when he stiffened slightly, asking. "What?" 'Great, now he read minds.' She thought and raised an eyebrow. "I didn't say anything." "He was a nice guy but admit it, it wouldn't have lasted." He softly persisted. Slightly disconcerted, she changed the subject. "Can we talk about something we can salvage?" "Good, that counts your reputation out." He deadpanned. "Funny." She growled. "Sorry. Couldn't help myself." 'Okay, so maybe he was less Barney and more Captain America cum Dilbert.' She silently grumbled. "I meant your future accommodation." "Oh." "I've been thinking...." She stopped and wondered which angle she could pitch the idea so that he'd accept without too much fuss. "That we'd get a small, cheaper place nearby and live on bread and water for the next year or so." He went completely rigid and she found her soft comfortable cushion of flesh cradling her head had gone hard. "We?" "We." She firmly decided and her tone warningly told him it was final. "No." The stubborn male had to try. "Jace..." "I was thinking of deferring a year, get a job and then go back to finish it." He quickly gave his version of the plan he had been concocting in their silence. "And just what would that achieve?" She straightened herself to look at him in the eye. He blinked twice. "If you defer, you might lose the scholarship." "So I'll get another one." "I doubt you'll find one that willing to cover 95% of your tuition fees as this one does. One word Jace, Recession." "So you suggest that we take your father's hard earned money and rent a tiny uncomfortable room for you and for me to freeload in?" "First of all, the cost of me living here is twenty percent more expensive if we found a place outside. Secondly, if we cooked and ate in, we could save on that too." He frowned at her. "You keep saying 'we'." "Because I do mean 'we', you idiot!" She sighed. "Listen Jace, it's only a year away for me. For you, if you spent less time working and more time on your coursework, you may be able to skip a couple more semesters. You'll finish faster and before you know it, you're an Intern." He studied her earnest face and shook his head slowly. "I can't ask you to do this, Joyce." "You didn't. I'm offering." "And just what are you going to tell your father?" "Nothing. I'm not going to worry him about us. I'll just ask Amy to make excuses every time he calls the dorm and I'll call him back later, it's as simple as that." "But..." She was beginning to get annoyed. "Damn it, Jace! What are you priorities at this moment?" "What?" He was genuinely taken aback. "This is what you've always wanted. You're so close but yet you insist of prolonging the journey, why?" Taking a moment to think through her words, his hand rose to touch her cheek. "Because Joyce, it's my journey, not yours." His words stung a little and for a moment she wondered if he still blamed her for all her earlier accusations. Shaking the thought, she ventured to more painful territories. "And just what is this journey you're taking?" Unsure what she was implying, he frowned. "What do you mean?" "Your father is gone, Jace." She resisted the urge to wince when his eyes narrowed with her implication. "You can decide now to take control of your life or let it control you. But whatever decision you make, know that you'll have to live with it, whether or not you find him again." His face showed a trace of anger but he forced himself to control it. She was right. It hurt to hear it but she made sense. It wasn't only her welfare he was thinking about. He was more confused and frightened about his missing father. And taking time out from his destiny was an opportunity to retreat, to hide, to give up, at least for a few blessed months. Tracking his father down the past few months was mentally and physically draining. He had checked his father's regular publishers and rare acquaintances. All claimed the same thing; that he had informed them that he would be out of town for a few days for a job. But then he never returned. The thing that scared him the most that all evidences pointed that his father had planned his disappearance. Their house sold through the e-mail, held nothing personal at all, according to the realtor and they received the keys through mail. All bank accounts were closed through the Internet and even the Tax Department was notified that he was not residing there any longer but no forwarding address. So what could Jason do? He filed a missing persons report, checked all hospitals, morgues, publishers within the state and finally when there was nothing else he could do, he returned to school; tired, confused, scared. Defeated. He was beginning to see that his relationship with his father was rather strange. He knew next to nothing about his past. He recalled every time he asked, he would be cleverly drawn away from it. After numerous attempts, he just gave up. It thoroughly puzzled the redhead in his arms. She always said that it was beyond her how he could allow his father to remain so distant. His thoughts focused to the present, dwelling on her words. 'Whether or not you find him again....' Cruel words but true. His father had lied to him before with his mysterious trips and as he grew older, there had been other things that he hadn't noticed before. Theories from being a widower in love or a secret agent working for the government evolved into being a prime witness to a mafia crime was in under a police protection program. So ultimately, she was right. How sure was he that he'll find him again? Maybe his father didn't want to be found. Sighing, he resigned himself and considered her proposal. The more he thought about it, the more plausible her solution became. The only thing was; he would owe her, big time. He caught her gaze and whispered. "You do realize after we move in together, you can forget about college guys." Slightly relieved he had given up the fight without too much emotional fuss, she smiled. "I'll take my chances with creeps in the workforce instead. Perhaps older men may be good for me." He disagreed but knew that her black belt in karate was testimony enough on how well she could take care of herself. Sighing, he drew her face closer to him. "Why do you put up with me, Joyce Callahan?" She unconsciously lifted her head and kissed his chin. "I don't know." Frowning, she muttered at the same time. "I think I may not have gotten over the guilt of attacking you when we were three." He grinned lazily and returned her kiss, on her chin. "I still dream of that day some times. Your bright eyes, your dazzling hair..." He trailed off to tilt her head slightly and then plant a soft kiss on her neck. "Your painfully strong grip round my neck." He dramatized his last sentence with a mock moan. She chuckled. "I also believe I was so mad that I pushed you on the ground, sat on your stomach and pulled your hair." He liked it when she chuckled, which wasn't often. "Yeah, what is it with women and hair-pulling anyway?" "We're practical. Easy to grip and hurts the other like hell." Her hand, unknowingly responding to his touch, made its way down his chest. "Men on the other hand, ball their fists and hurt themselves in the process." For a second, Jason was overwhelmed with a sudden rush of senses. Her nearness, the scent of her soap, her teasing voice, her beauty and her wondering hand all clouded his wits. Especially, her wondering hand. He felt his jeans tighten. "Yeah, women were always smarter." He huskily agreed, kissing her again. She raised an eyebrow. 'He was actually agreeing?' Feeling slightly suspicious, she turned slowly to face him again. But he astounded her by brushing her mouth against hers. Her eyes were wide open when he did it again and again, delicately, as if teasing her. "Jace?" She managed to utter in between. "Hmm?" He tempted her further, biting softly at her lower lip until she let it open a little. Then he turned probing, darting his tongue in and out in a maddening manner. She forgot that it was her turn to answer, too occupied with his gentle attention on her mouth and the furious hammering of his heartbeat. Instead of alarming her, it sent a quickening through her own pulse. She squelched it swiftly. 'It was only Jason, for God's sake!' But his tongue sent her breathless again the next second, plunging slowly but thoroughly into her mouth. 'Lord, the guy can kiss!' She thought and added another fictional character into his current three- persona title, Mr. Frenchy, she decided was the fourth. Then regaining an ounce of sense, she tried protesting again. "Jace!" He snapped his head up and looked at her moist lips, annoyed. "What?" "You're kissing me." He groaned. "You stopped me to tell me that?" She rolled her eyes and reminded him. "I'm one bra size too small for you." Shaking his head, he dropped his mouth on hers again. Half a minute later, he took the trouble reply. "I don't care." "Yes, you do." She warned shakily. "You'll just be disappointed." Wondering if she meant it literally or as an analogy, he sincerely told her. "You could never disappoint me Joyce." She laughed. "In this aspect, I will." He gazed at her for a moment and then realized that she had done the right thing. She had wisely stopped a mistake before it turned into a disaster. Levelheaded, that what she always was. He was the passionate one, logical but passionate. "That bad?" She briefly recalled when they first French kissed in junior high. It was before their first major boy girl party and they wanted to be sure that their French kisses weren't too slobbery so they tried it out with each other. "No, you still haven't lost your touch." He grinned. "Really?" Clearly amused, she stroked his ego. "Really. In fact, that's the best kiss I've had in a long time. Danny plunged too much." "Ugh, I know what you mean. Jenn Torey did that a lot too." She gazed at him, her eyes taking in the broad safe shoulders that she had come to trust throughout the years, shoulders that were strong, well defined, taut, sexy.... 'God, did she just think 'sexy'?' Horrified, she quickly looked away and settled back onto his chest, her flushed cheeks hidden from his view but burning against his shirt. Jason smiled. He caught her primal look of interest followed by panic all too clearly. So he wasn't the only one throbbing with desire. Funny, after all these years, they had never bothered to really look or notice each other. They just quietly assumed that they just weren't attracted to each other. But they were. They were, after all just a man and a woman. "It was natural." He told her quietly. "It was weird." She insisted. "Yeah, I know." "Do me a favour, don't kiss me again." "Why not?" "I want good-looking, less dorky kids." He rolled his eyes. "Yeah and I want blonde kids." "Good, then we understand each other." He sighed and muttered. "If only you had breasts...." "Oh shut up, you bust Neanderthal!" XXXXXXXXXX End of A Father is Hard to Find (Part One of One) Author: PhileyX E-Mail: phileyx@yahoo.com Web-site: http://www.angelfire.com/id/phileyx